TMI Tuesday: 04th May 2021 – Fill In The Blank

Black and white photo of couple with a finger on their lips and faded black banner and white test reading TMI Tuesday

Good evening lovelies,

I hope this post finds you all well. It’s been a cold, blustery day in Bristol so I’m glad to be tucked up in the warm now. I even did some tying down with chain and a padlock earlier… too bad it was just our patio table! 😉

Alright, on with the questions!

What Is TMI Tuesday?

TMI Tuesday is a series of questions generated by TMI Tuesday Blog. It is a great way to meet other bloggers and to share some thoughts and experiences. It is important to remember that there are no right or wrong answers to these questions, only the answers of the author –  and that’s part of what makes this tag so awesome! 

How To Play TMI Tuesday

Copy the TMI Tuesday questions below to your webspace (i.e., a blog). Answer the questions there, then leave a comment below, on this blog post, so we’ll all know where to read your responses. Please don’t forget to link to tmituesdayblog from your website!

Send Us Your Questions!

Do you have something you’ve been itching to ask? Maybe something food-related, something a little bit kinky or something completely random? Have fun with it, then be sure to check back next Tuesday for our answers!

Your questions will be answered by BOTH of us, unless addressed otherwise. You can leave your questions in the comments below or, if you prefer anonymity, you can email us at

Fill in the blank.

 1. Friends = _____ 

Helen: Non-essential. I know, that sounds really sucky to say, doesn’t it? Hear me out. My 21st birthday party, I invited 80 people and only 9 showed up. On my 23rd birthday party, I invited a dozen friends over for BBQ and due to an unexpected change in my gran’s mood (she had Alzheimer’s disease and lived with us), we had to stay outside and use a camping toilet in the shed. It was far from ideal and we were all frustrated by this new arrangement, but it was outside of my control and most of my friends were very sympathetic. This is the key in this situation though, most. The one that wasn’t so understanding suddenly hopped up and declared “this sucks, who’s coming to Flamingo’s? (A popular nightclub in Bristol) and left, taking about 6-7 people with her. In the end, the only ones who stayed were Matt, his friend, my brother and me. Since then, I don’t hold birthday parties anymore. Even when we got married, I refused to have too many people there because “I’m not providing free food for people who don’t give a sh*t about me”. I’ve learned the hard way that your ‘friends’ can wind up disappointing you and I’m really sensitive to that. Please don’t make plans with me and then just ‘forget’ about them later on, and don’t reply to my text with “haha” or “lol” if you don’t plan to follow up somehow later in the day. To me, one-word answers say you don’t care and I might as well invest my time elsewhere. I have only one friend that I consider close, or at least relatively close anyway, because I wouldn’t want him to think that I’d gone soft on him all of a sudden 😉

Matt: Good times, though life (and Covid-19!) can certainly get in the way of those good times.

2. I’m done with _____.

Helen: Social distancing. Just… like… there are so many things about social distancing that really frustrate me, and not in the way that I want to go hugging and kissing everyone that I meet, either. My fish sales are kind of an awkward dance of limbs that are trying to avoid contact, because of social distancing. I offered a grocery delivery guy one of those plastic mask inserts because I have a few to spare and I wanted to make his job easier for him while he’s wearing a mask to keep our city fed, but he had to decline, you know, because of social distancing. My biggest pet peeve is when I go to the store with my Mum and I stand back to make room (because social distancing!) and some… individual walks on through. That is not your space! That is not your space to barge on in, ignore what’s going on and grab whatever you fancy ahead of me. It is also not your right to give me weird looks like I’m some kind of crazy lady who spends her time stalking other people in the bacon aisle. The other, other ones who really p*ss me off? You stop and try to make space for them and they either aren’t looking at what’s going on around them or they simply don’t say thankyou, or worse, both. I’ve been this close to getting a t-shirt printed over that sh*t…

Matt: Energy vampires. I’m fed up with people who just take, take, take and don’t add any value to my life. I’ve had people in my life who have tried to take (or have taken) things from me, everything from brand new video games to old ex-girlfriends! Dramatic, negative people can go with them, too. Basically, like Helen, anyone who wastes my energy and time.

 3. I’m ready for _____. 

Helen: May 17th, baby! It’s our eight-year wedding anniversary and the first day we’re allowed up to six people indoors without getting our asses whooped, so I’m thinking about doing a little something to celebrate the two with the family. I’ve already said to Matt that I don’t want any gifts (gifts = clutter in my eyes). BBQ with the family? Heaven!

Matt: Summer! After being in lockdown for more than a year, I’m looking forward to having barbecues, visiting bars etc. Fun times!

4. The oldest _____ I have is _____. 

Helen: Teddy bear that I have is 32 years old and has a hat and scarf knitted by my grandmother. He’s a white bear called Snowy because he has a white snowflake on his nose, though he’s always been Uncle Snowy to me. Uncle Snowy knows everything.

Matt: I can outdo that, mine is 34!

Helen: This isn’t a competition…

5. Take some _____, mix it all together and you have _____. 

Helen: Flour, water, cornflour, salt and bicarbonate of soda, mix it up and you have a perfect, light, crispy batter. It’s basically an adaptation of tempura batter and I use it to coat anything. Add half a teaspoon ground black pepper if you want to liven up the party.

Matt: Umm… *Draws two Cards Against Humanity cards*

Helen: Hey!

Matt: Mix up some reverse cowgirl and you have swiftly achieving an orgasm.

Helen: … I guess that works.

Bonus: Tonight I am looking forward to _____, and tomorrow I really want to _____ !

Helen: I’ put up one of those magnetic spice jar racks later so I’m really looking forward to writing my own spice labels and sealing them with some Mod Podge tis evening, then totally having an organised kitchen at last! Our kitchen is only 1.8 x 4 metres, so you have to get super creative with storage solutions. I might have to do a kitchen tour sometime! As for tomorrow? Tomorrow is back to work for Matt, so I plan to use that time to draft some of my posts that I want to take a little bit more time to work on.

Matt: Oh there can only be one answer! Scott Mills and Chris Stark are narrating Channel 4’s Naked Attraction this evening, so I’m looking forward to that. I even made a brief appearance on Radio One the other day as part of their Blow Your Trumpet programme, which was a really exciting and nerve-wracking experience! As for tomorrow, I think it has to be Helen’s hoisin beef stir fry. It’s a great mid-week meal!

Alright lovelies, that’s it from us again for this week. Don’t forget to take a look at our question below and let us hear your answers. We’d love to hear from you!

Until next time.

Stay safe & have fun,

Helen & Matt xx

Puppy Pic Of The Week

Look who got into the laundry!

Two Kinky Cooks Wants to Know…

If you had a one in a thousand chance of winning £1,000 , or 1 in a million chance of winning £1, 000, 000 , which would you choose and why?

7 thoughts on “TMI Tuesday: 04th May 2021 – Fill In The Blank

  1. Hahaha. I love this.

    Oooh Matt. Alrighty then!

    Bonus: Had to search Mod Podge. Learned something new.

    Thanks Helen and Matt for the insight, good thoughts, and fun.


    P.S. I am in love with this pup.

    1. Helen – It is impossible to become an expert where no manual exists. I am not a BDSM expert, I am simply a writer with more than a decade of experience in the BDSM scene. Knowledgeable and sometimes inspiring, even occasionally actually funny. Broken in body, relentless in spirit.
      Helen says:

      Mod Podge is really awesome stuff! I still haven’t done my labels, but Mod Podge is one of those things that you don’t really think you need, and then all of a sudden there are thousands of things that you can think to use It on. A laminator is another one such example, When our last one broke, I lost count of how many times I wanted to make a sign for something, and couldn’t. Its replacement is now in my blogging cupboard!

      He’s one spoilt boy! A big bag of natural treats and a dog-friendly birthday cake. Nobody can say he doesn’t eat well.

  2. Who we call or classify as friends is tricky. I have been disappointed by “friends”. But honestly, deep down I did not hold those “friends” dear because I knew they were not true or could be shady but I enjoyed some aspect of hanging out with them so I kept them around but kept them at bay too.

    Good times…yes, covid19 interrupted what one might call their typical or regular good times. I simply made some new good times. Yes, I would still like to do some of the old stuff again, too.

    Matt! I hear ya. In my thirties, I learned to get rid of energy-suckers fast. I was a pleaser. I even let people who stole my work get away with it, just to keep the peace.
    Happy Anniversary (early). I hope the BBQ or anytime with family happens for you both.
    Those are some really old teddy bears. Cool!

    1. Helen – It is impossible to become an expert where no manual exists. I am not a BDSM expert, I am simply a writer with more than a decade of experience in the BDSM scene. Knowledgeable and sometimes inspiring, even occasionally actually funny. Broken in body, relentless in spirit.
      Helen says:

      Oh definitely, there were little niggles for several years with the “friend” who walked out of my birthday party, so the fact that she did that was almost like the first skim of icing on the cake, with several more “layers” to follow. She was random and spontaneous and that was fun, but it was her pettiness and childishness that I think really pulled us apart. Some of the things that she used to complain about would be non-issues for me, personally.

      I think Covid-19 has definitely helped us appreciate what is important. As soon as we could see the family again, we’ve been concrete in making sure we spend plenty of time together. We can have some strong differences of opinion sometimes, but when push comes to shove, we’d still rather be annoyed by one another than find ourselves apart.

      Being a pleaser is hard. I used to be (and still am, to some degree) but I’ve definitely cracked down on a lot of people. Toxic people, copycats, liars and cheaters, those are just some of the people that I’ve done away with now. The one thing that I’m probably still guilty of is saying “there’s no problem” when I definitely do have a problem.

      Thankyou! We’re only planning tea and cake (oh so British!) but it shall be good.

      They are indeed! I have several others that are close to my heart (Panda would be one, which my Dad personally chose for me when he used to do a Santa’s grotto at my school) but aren’t quite as old.

  3. Ooo this is fun! And I love your answers and your question.

    Let’s see… I’d go for the lower money but higher chance of winning. That would be a fun shopping spree, anyway!

    1. Helen – It is impossible to become an expert where no manual exists. I am not a BDSM expert, I am simply a writer with more than a decade of experience in the BDSM scene. Knowledgeable and sometimes inspiring, even occasionally actually funny. Broken in body, relentless in spirit.
      Helen @ TKC says:

      Thankyou! And yes, I think I would, too. £1,000 is not a huge sum of money but it’s enough to take some of those pressures off, maybe even sort a bit of Christmas shopping out so that I can relax in the winter months!

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