Get Ready With Me: What To Eat Before A BDSM Scene

Because the night begins as soon as you get home.

Hello Twisties,

I feel as though it’s been a while since I’ve written anything particularly helpful or informative, but today I wanted to change all of that. I’ve seen this post come up a lot on my stats recently and so I really wanted to work on that, to keep giving you more of the advice that you seek and maybe to provide you with some of the other answers that you have been looking for, too.

Today and ahead of my evening, I wanted to combine two things that I am extremely passionate about: food and kink. Although there are no hard and fast rules about what you should eat before a BDSM scene (Domino’s, anyone?) I feel as though maybe there are some do’s and don’ts that I personally would advise, which I’ll get onto in just a moment.

For me, nothing kicks off my Kinky Fuckery Friday evening quite like the smell of a homemade chicken rogan josh. With the richness of tomatoes, onions and spices in the air, that’s where it all really begins for me. Call me a bit fussy if you like, but to me, the sensual experiences of the night start long, long before you enter the bedroom.

So, what do I suggest you eat? Here are some of my personal top tips:

Do: Go For White Meat, Fish Or Vegetarian Dishes

There’s nothing more carnal than tucking into a nice, big juicy steak, but red meat also takes longer for your body to digest. I love myself a grilled sirloin steak, but before a night of rough, kinky sex? It can leave me feeling a little bloated. To combat that, opt for lighter proteins like white meat or fish, or simply skip out meat altogether.

Don’t: Go For Fast Food

I get it, I mentioned Domino’s, but I much prefer Domino’s on movie night than I do on a kinky sex night. Grease and processed foods can leave you feeling queasy, which again, is definitely not something you’ll want to be feeling. Instead, opt for unprocessed foods, like lentils, rice, or baby potatoes.

Do: Go For Smaller Portions

Remember what I said about bloating? Yeah, nope, it’s still not good news. To beat off the bloat, maybe try eating a little bit less? The curry that we eat is served with a garlic and coriander naan instead of rice – rather than as well as rice – which I love because it means that there is still some carbohydrate to leave me feeling simply satisfied. Try to eat enough that you feel comfortable, but not so much that you feel full.

Don’t: Skip Meals (Or At Least A Snack)

I know, you’re not here to learn about food really, are you? But you know what sucks the fun out of kinky sex almost as fast as a dodgy kebab? Yep, a blood sugar low. I really encourage you to slow down and enjoy your whole evening together, but if you’re going to rush into the main event then I can’t stop you. At the very least though, grab yourself some sort of snack beforehand – and no, I don’t mean your partner!

Do: Explore Aphrodisiacs

I adore ginger. It’s warming, sweet, spicy fragrance and flavour really brings out that side of me, but there are many, many other aphrodisiac foods to try. From Artichokes to apples, bananas to broccoli and oysters to onion juice, here are thirty other food ideas for you to explore.

Don’t: Force Yourself To Try Oysters

Confession – I don’t eat seafood. Unless it’s been caught on a hook and line, I don’t eat it. I grew up on seafood, and though I used to eat cockles religiously as a small child, these days I don’t enjoy seafood at all. A lot of people don’t like oysters, a lot of people don’t like the taste or the texture, but they’ll try them anyway just to liven up their libido. They’re not cheap and they’re not particularly easy to prepare, so if you’re not sure or you just don’t like the idea, skip them off of your menu.

Do: Opt For Dessert (If You Like)

If you’re like me, then you definitely have a sweet tooth. From a cheeky slice of mid-morning carrot cake to a scoop of rum and raisin ice cream by the sea, I do love myself a sweet treat, and why not than after dinner and before a BDSM scene? There’s no need to rush these things, so find something that you’ll both enjoy. Maybe it’s the richness of dark chocolate, the luxuriousness of salted caramel or the sensuality of feeding one another strawberries and cream. Whatever it is, now is the time to indulge all of your senses.

Don’t: Get Pudding For Two

Yep, we’re back here because on the topic of sharing, it can be really, really tempting to buy or make one of those desserts-for-two and personally, I know that I wouldn’t advise it here. Whilst there is certainly something sexy in sharing food with your partner, the temptation might just be to overindulge and leave yourself feeling bloated instead. Remember what we said before? Bloating = bad.

Do: Think About The Little Things

A little secret? I like to serve up an after dinner mint chocolate on Kinky Fuckery Friday. There’s no real purpose to it of course, other than a little bit of class. From soft music and serveware, table settings and finishing touches, think about what it will take to make your meal a special part of the evening for you.

Don’t: Opt For Strong Flavours

Buddy, now is not the time to be taking on the spicy wing challenge. I get it, maybe it seems like a great way to impress a date, but unless you guys share that kind of thing, now is not the time. Strong cheeses, strong fish smells and anything else that might linger and ruin the mood are probably to be avoided, too.

Do: Drink Responsibly With (Or After) Your Meal

I do love a glass of rosé wine after my curry on Kinky Fuckery Friday, but it has to be one glass only. My goal is not to get drunk, or even tipsy, it is purely to unwind. There is absolutely nothing wrong with having a a little something alcoholic to drink ahead of your play session, but remember, everything in moderation.

Don’t: Get Drunk

No really, don’t, not even a little bit. Playing when you’re drunk can be dangerous, for both you and your partner. Alcohol thins the blood, so even a small cut or graze can bleed significantly. It impairs your co-ordination, potentially leading you to land strokes of an implement incorrectly. It lowers inhibitions, possibly leading to a violation of consent or unprotected sex. Lastly, if you’re both drunk and a Dominant topples over, how is a bound submissive expected to phone for an ambulance? Safety first, people!

And Finally…

Do: Relax, Laugh & Have Fun

So many people approach BDSM as a strict and serious affair, but really, there is absolutely nothing wrong with laughter and good old-fashioned fun being a part of your dynamic. In fact, before Tumblr banned sexually explicit content, I used to follow a whole thread related to the idea! Laughter is a great way to connect and build trust, which is absolutely a must-have for any healthy, lasting BDSM relationship.

Don’t: Be Tempted By Drugs

What you do in your free time is what you do, but when you’re mixing illegal substances with something in which things can go very wrong and very quickly, I have an issue. In fact, I know that I’m not the only one with an issue, because I have been to several clubs where the staff will throw you out if you so much as even think about stepping into the dungeon space while under the influence of narcotics. You might see it in movies, but trust me, many of us who are serious about what we do take a hard-line approach to people mixing illegal substances and BDSM. Just don’t do it, okay? It’s for your own good, I promise.

That’s it from me for today’s post Twisties. What do you like to eat ahead of a BDSM scene? Let me hear your thoughts in the comments!

Until next time,

Stay safe & have fun,

Helen xx

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