Let’s talk about love and matters of the heart for this TMI Tuesday.
Who’s back for another round?
What Is TMI Tuesday?
TMI Tuesday is a series of questions generated by TMI Tuesday Blog. It is a great way to meet other bloggers and to share some personal thoughts and experiences. It is important to remember that there are no right or wrong answers to these questions, only the answers of the author – and that’s part of what makes this tag so awesome!
How To Play TMI Tuesday
Copy the below TMI Tuesday questions to your webspace (i.e., a blog). Answer the questions there, then leave a comment below, on this blog post, so we’ll all know where to read your responses. Please don’t forget to link to tmituesdayblog from your website!
Send Me Your Questions!
Do you have something you’ve been itching to ask? Maybe something food-related, something a little bit kinky or something completely random? Have fun with it, then be sure to check back next Tuesday for my answer!
And now, onto the questions…
NB. Some of these questions relate to a significant other and I’m a polyamorous person. However, as I’m only physically involved with one at this time and that is my longest relationship, I’ll be basing my answers on that.
1. If you could see two things change about your significant other what would they be?
I think his confidence for one – Matt is worrying about going grey (ahem, “peppered like a fine steak” 😉 ) and I really haven’t noticed it. Maybe getting up a bit earlier on days off too, but then I too was in bed until 2PM yesterday, for reasons we don’t need to go into 😉
2. What are two things you forgot to celebrate last year?
One was little Hugo’s birthday. I know, I know, I’m just the worst dog mom! Umm… besides that, maybe my Dad’s birthday? I still try to anyway, even though he’s no longer with us. Just because they’re gone, doesn’t mean they’ve been forgotten.
3. Are you and your significant other both good at apologizing?
Good but could be better I think. I’m good at only listening to respond sometimes, and Matt’s good at the dreaded “I’m sorry if you feel that way”. We don’t have screaming matches – I think having both growing up with parents with tempers, we both just decided that there must be another way. We’re direct with one another, but we avoid saying unkind things and accusations, assumptions or generalisations. In fact, I could probably write a whole blog post on how to argue better with your partner. Like I say, we’re not perfect, but nobody has ever said things they didn’t mean and the police have never been called. I’d call that a success.
4. What would you not admit on a first date?
Probably the last time I took a dump or something? I don’t know, I’m a pretty open book but I do believe that first impressions count and I do try to act like a lady, you know, until I don’t.
That reminds me of this song that I discovered the other day, it’s pretty old but I’m hooked!
5. Is rebound sex empowering?
It can be and it can’t be.
Can’t be: Matt ended up briefly hooking up with a girl when we were “just friends”, which broke my heart because I was really into him. I ended up dating a then-friend, R, who was sweet enough but had plans to go back to Ireland to be with his Mum and didn’t have the guts to tell me, so instead, he told my Mum and left her to do the dumping. It’s not very empowering being told by your Mum that the guy you were seeing has upped and left the country!
Can be: When we did eventually sort ourselves out… well… this started from two broken-hearted friends who just kind of ended up with a little bit of a thing going on! Actually, us and our story is why I love the movie, Friends With Benefits, because it’s almost exactly like how it happened. There was no love at first sight, no Matt liking the look of me and asking me for my mumber, we were just friends who decided to scratch an itch together, and it was only when we were both seeing other people that were both like “shit, you know what? I really want to be with that person”. Luckily, we both felt the same and we’ve been inseperable ever since!
Bonus: How do you mend a broken heart?
A broken heart is basically what grief is, so I treat it like grief – with time, tissues and buckets of Ben & Jerry’s. No, but seriously, grief and a broken heart are a time for some serious self-love (not like that! Although maybe like that) and so things like journalling, connecting with friends and family, meditation, eating well and getting plenty of rest. Basically, all of the things that you can do to make you feel better, and if that also happens to be a pint of ice cream or a chocolate chip muffin? Go for it! Just don’t go overboard.