Water ‘Bout That?

A person catches water from a pipe in their hands

Another week’s thoughts and musings.

True to form, whenever it feels like life is on the up, something comes along to trip you up again. It started on Monday for me, I’d done my bits of housework, breezed at putting the ASDA shop away and was now contently relaxing on the sofa for ten minutes. That was when the news came in.

“I’ve got a message. Everybody is safe but Ruby is gone.”

I stared at Matt for a moment and mouthed the name over and over again. Ruby? Who the fuck is Ruby? Do I even know a Ruby?

Ruby is my brother’s car.

Shit! Has Mally been involved in an accident? Is my baby brother okay?

I was ready to throw my coat on and get to the hospital. It’s minutes from here and nothing else matters when a loved one is on the ward. There’s few I guard like I guard my little brother – it’s just what a big sister does.

“He was at a rave and apparently somebody rolled over his car. She’s a write-off.”.

Oh, well that’s less bad. It’s still bad though.

I felt sad for Mally, and annoyed. Sad, because it’s a shitty thing to do to someone – to anyone – and annoyed because somebody had picked on my family and that’s just not something you do. I wanted to go roll them over, or something.. Yeah! How would they like being on their back with their feet waving in the air? That’s what I would do! Caught in a blinding rage, I’d upend the fucker. Let’s see how they like it!

It turns out, plots of vengeance aren’t really my forté.

copper puzzle wedding anniversary keyrings stamped with 17.05.2013 BNFFE
Anniversary copper keyrings received on Monday 🙂 What does BNFFE stand for? That’s here

On Tuesday I took a delivery of the new gravel grid, 48 of them to be exact. I was nervous in a way – I wasn’t sure how big they’d be, or how heavy, or how many I could lift at one time on my own. I scoured the listing over and over again, trying to find the necessary information:

50 x 50cm, 1.5kg each.

1.5 kilograms? That can’t be right! Maybe it’s 15 kilograms? Only time will tell.

But it was right, and they’re now stacked up and ready to start the back garden makeover tomorrow. A complete relay of the gravel, purely because nobody mentioned gravel grids before we first laid down the gravel. A top tip for my readers here: If you decide to lay gravel in the garden and you intend to walk on it, be sure to put some gravel grids down first. Pea shingle on mulch is like trying to walk on marbles. Had I known, the grids would have saved me from a twisted ankle or twenty. You live and you learn.

On Thursday I spoke to my mother. Once again she sounded rough, not deathly but groggy, like sombody with a nasty cold. Wasn’t she supposed to be over it now?

Next week Mum has to go for a bunch of labwork, including an ECG and then possibly to have a stent put in in the not too distant future. I’m trying to be rational and positive about it but the mind roams – she’s my Mum.

Dad had an angiogram to try and dioagnose one thing and three months later he was dead from something else.

I’m trying to be positive, but I’d be lying if I said I’m not scared, and she seems a bit scared too. Like it or not, she’s not as young as she used to be and she seems so downcast about that now. My Crackerjack Mum, it seems, is gone.

Frozen milk with black writing that reads "Arctic Moo!" silly funny life humor
Arctic Moo! Frozen milk – Silly? Me? Maybe a little bit 😛

Last night and for date night, we managed to catch the tail end of 50 First Dates. I smiled – it’s always great when the one you love knows your favourite movie – and yet something caught me offguard.

The bastard. There were hopes and dreams and promises of boats and sailing and adventure and, and what happened? What became of that? Nothing, not without compromising myself. I thought I was doing well to forgive and move on, and yet maybe I’m not. Maybe I am still hurting inside.

Why do I even care so much? That’s what’s driving me insane. Why do I care? Why did I want somebody who didn’t want me, all of me, exactly as I am? Why do I care about him when it seems he didn’t care that much about me? Maybe I’m not done, maybe I’m not done processing all of this fuckedupness, not one bit.

And you know what? That’s okay.

That’s okay, because even if he doesn’t care, there are people who do, and somehow, the fact that there are people who do makes the people who don’t completely irrelevant. Like anti-matter, except they really don’t matter. They don’t matter at all

chili rasbora bororas brigittae tropical water fish
A photo of one of my chili rasbora taken tonight – check out those colours!

To conclude, I’m going to leave you with this little riddle: :Water. What does it taste like? What does it smell like? Does it taste different (or smell different) in different places, to you? I’m curious to know!

I have an affinity for water, and as a child, I could lose myself for hours playing with the stuff. I feel spiritually connected to water too, and in many ways, I feel it sort of symbolises me: It’s both simple and complicated at the same time -unwaveringly plain and yet far too complex to describe. It’s gentle and harmless, or, with enough energy, it can be incredibly harmful to anyone and anyhing in its way. It can be cold, or it can be hot. Too little of it, or too much.

But it was when I took a sip of water last night that it had my mind in a boggle.

What does water taste like? Is the taste of water a taste, or a sensation? Do we taste it with the back of our mouth, or the tip of our tongue? How do you describe it, exactly?

Over to you.

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